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A wife of noble character, who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Proverbs 31:10


how to be a Proverbs 31 woman in today's world

A Wife of Noble Character

Wow.  This biblical ideal wife can do everything, it seems!  She gardens, cooks, sews clothing for her family and drapes for her home.  She helps the needy and is an entrepreneur and she does it all while looking amazing.  It’s easy to read this scripture and feel overwhelmed or defeated.  I mean, HOW in the world can you do all of that with pets, work, kids and their activities and a needy husband?  You may dismiss it altogether thinking that being a Proverbs 31 woman just isn’t feasible in today’s society.

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Well, dear friend, I’m here to tell you that you CAN live a Proverbs 31 life and it is what God wants from us as his daughters.  Granted, we don’t have to plant our own fields (hey, we have grocery stores now) or sew your own clothes (hello? Macy’s!), but you can live a godly life pleasing to Him, in the image of the Proverbs 31 woman, in 2018.  Now, there’s nothing wrong with planting a garden or sewing your own clothes. I have a huge garden that we enjoy the fruits of every year, but that’s really not what this is all about.

A Biblical Wife in Today's World


Becoming a Proverbs 31 Woman

So what IS it all about?  Being a Proverbs 31 godly woman is about living a life that is one of ministry.  It is putting God first and your husband second and everything, yes, even your children, after that.  It is about being industrious instead of idle. It is serving your husband, your family and your community.  It’s not about having a perfectly spotless home or wearing the latest fashions.  Again, there is nothing wrong with those things, but it is a matter of putting your priorities in order.

The Bible uses the root word for “virtuous” or ‘excellent” four times to describe women.  In one of my favorite books of the Bible, Ruth, Boaz says to Ruth: 11 And now, my daughter, don’t be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character.” and in Proverbs 12:4 “A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”

The original Hebrew word for virtuous is Chayil (khah’ – yil). It means a force, an army, strength, able, substance, worthy, capable, strong, valiant.  Woah?  What?  I’m supposed to be strong and valiant, too?  Yes, dear one, and you already are.  God created you that way.


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A Wife of Noble Character is a Virtuous Woman

A wife who is virtuous is able to take care of her home, is worthy, strong, serves and loves her husband, is capable and industrious. Most importantly, a virtuous wife is what her husband (not any other husband, but HER husband) needs.  God created woman to be man’s helper. . 

18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

What the ideal woman is for YOUR husband is as unique as he is; but while the specifics of how to be a suitable helper to your husband are unique to him and your marriage, the concept is the same – a wife of noble character is her husband’s crown.

Learning your husband’s love languages and serving him through those love languages is a great way to ensure that you are the Proverbs 31 wife that YOUR husband needs. My husband’s love languages includes gifts and acts of service.  This isn’t saying that the only way to make him happy is to buy stuff for him.  I’ll pick up his favorite snack at the grocery store or leave him a love note.  Your husband may respond to words of affirmation or physical touch.  The key is learning what your husband needs from his wife; this Proverbs 31 woman in his life.

We were created to be his helpmeet.  What does your husband need in a modern Proverbs 31 woman?  Have you asked him?  I encourage you to pray about this and see what God reveals to you.  Then, ask your husband what he needs from you. You may learn that what you thought was important to him isn’t and that there are other things that he would rather you do. Husband’s are funny creatures.  When I asked my husband this question, he told me how much he appreciates my making his homemade sweet tea.  He says that it shows how much I care for him.  Really?  Who knew that something so small (in my eyes) touched him so much!

Bible Gateway has a great commentary on a wife of noble character.  You may wish to check it out.

Want more on living a Proverbs 31 Life?
Grab my FREE 5 Steps Toward a Proverbs 31 Life!

What makes your husband unique?  How can you be a crown to him and not decay in his bones? What are three things that you know your husband would appreciate you doing that you don’t already do or don’t do very often?

A Wife of Noble Character in Today's World
What it means to be a Proverbs 31 Woman in Today's World

If you aren’t sure, spend some time this week asking God to reveal this to you.

If you are seeking more resources on living the Proverbs 31 life, consider these book recommendations below:

Becoming the Woman God Wants Me to Be: A 90-Day Guide to Living the Proverbs 31 Life by Donna Partow

The Path to Becoming a Proverbs 31 Wife: Walking in Your God-given Role by Jennifer Rash

Or check out a different perspective from Mary at Healthy Christian Home.

In His Love and Mine,


What it means to be a Proverbs 31 Woman in Today's World

woman of noble character

A Wife of Noble Character in Today's World (1)

Susan is a writer, speaker and the creator of Women of Noble Character ministries. She is passionate about helping Christian women live a Proverbs 31 life in today’s world. The Lord laid upon her heart to serve women to grow in Christ, improve their marriages and manage their homes stress-free. She provides tools and resources on her website for Christian women to grow in their faith, deepen their relationship with their husbands and manage their homes well.

She lives in rural North Central Missouri with her handsome and hilarious husband and a myriad of dogs, cats and chickens.

Susan runs on Jesus, coffee and not enough sleep.